Christmas Time

   I love Christmas. I always have. I love giving of myself. Mandy does as well. Last Christmas was one of sadness. Dad had passed away just a few short weeks prior. Mom was devastated. We all were. I think about last Christmas quite a bit. Having cancer brings a greater appreciation for every day but especially those special days spent with family and loved ones. This year will be the first Christmas in a long time that most of my family will be home and will be spending it at our home. I am so excited. We see two of our granddaughters quite regularly but we have not been able to spend more than a few days in the last few years with our other three granddaughters. This year I thought they will be spending Christmas Eve with us. 

    I have done so well in my fight with cancer that my kids have a hard time seeing me as a cancer patient. I'm healthy, I'm out going, and I seldom talk about this disease with them. Sometimes I even forget that I have cancer.

    I wasted a lot of years and my kids were younger. Those who have journeyed through my blog in its entirety know that I made a mess out of my life. Cancer, among other things, changed hat. It helped me to realize what was important. It helped to make me a better husband, father, grandfather, and friend sometimes I wonder if things would be different had I not have gotten sick. Would I be the person that I am today? I counted as another blessing having this disease has bestowed upon me.  never have this gift. They live their lives thinking that everything is great and then one day it ends. Cancer gave me 10 1/2 years and counting to get it right. I'm not there yet! I still have a long way to go. My son spends a lot of time living in the past. I often wonder if I will ever get through to him that the past can't be changed. We have today. That's all that we have. 

   My son and granddaughters again did not make it up to our home. Their gifts are still wrapped and under the tree. Each year it is the same. Sometimes Christmas can be a real bummer